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Grex > Femme > #102: WHO SAID LOOKS SHOULD BE EVERYTHING? | |
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| 25 new of 69 responses total. |
mta
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response 5 of 69:
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Sep 15 19:55 UTC 1998 |
Huge.
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keesan
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response 6 of 69:
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Sep 15 21:42 UTC 1998 |
I asked you to enter it because i thought other people would be interested.
I don't particularly care what I look like or what other people think of my
looks, I must be some sort of exception. Nor do I recall what other people
are wearing, including glasses. People are more interested in the appearance
of women than of men because it is women who have to be healthy and strong
enough to have babies, men only need to have access to resources to support
them.
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mary
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response 7 of 69:
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Sep 15 22:55 UTC 1998 |
Re: 101 Almost no problem at all.
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mta
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response 8 of 69:
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Sep 15 23:40 UTC 1998 |
101? Gosh, mary, looks like you have your Chrystal Ball tuned up tonight.
;)
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keesan
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response 9 of 69:
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Sep 16 00:40 UTC 1998 |
was that re item 101?
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remmers
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response 10 of 69:
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Sep 16 01:00 UTC 1998 |
(re resp:4, I imagine.)
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md
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response 11 of 69:
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Sep 16 01:47 UTC 1998 |
(But isn't 101 binary 5?)
Erica Jong has an interesting essay about women attacking
women, somewhere on the web. I'll look it up.
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valerie
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response 12 of 69:
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Sep 20 12:41 UTC 1998 |
This response has been erased.
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keesan
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response 13 of 69:
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Sep 22 21:24 UTC 1998 |
Symmetry is often considered beautiful, in that lack of symmetry can indicate
poorer health or genetic problems.
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i
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response 14 of 69:
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Sep 22 22:40 UTC 1998 |
I've read of studies with computer-generated faces - average 20 so-so-looking
people's facial features in the computer, give the average near-perfect
symmetry, and the resulting face gets a definite beautiful/handsome rating.
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beeswing
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response 15 of 69:
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Sep 24 03:47 UTC 1998 |
Yep. For women the wide eyes, narrow cheekbones and defined chin are
what's defined as ideal symmetry. Also, larger pupils are supposed to
be more attractive. Supposedly, the pupils dilate slightly when you are
aroused.
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keesan
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response 16 of 69:
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Sep 24 14:31 UTC 1998 |
Wide eyes and a high forehead have often been considered attractive on women,
along with a small pouting mouth and puffy cheeks, which is the same set of
features found in babies. It makes the women look young and helpless. There
have been times when women plucked off hair from their forehead (Mona Lisa),
or shaved their eyebrows, to look babyish. Larger pupils, as achieved by
belladona (also used in eye exams for the same purpose), are found during
sexual arousal and make women look sexier. Belladonna probably interfered
with vision, but since when was health more important than beauty. When most
people worked outside, pale skins were attractive (take arsenic regularly to
make sure you have less red blood), when most people worked inside tans were
attractive. Same for fat when most people were thin, and vice versa.
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md
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response 17 of 69:
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Sep 29 14:06 UTC 1998 |
Erica Jong's essay about women attacking women is on
http://www.ericajong.com/nyobserver980713.htm
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bookworm
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response 18 of 69:
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Jun 19 11:38 UTC 1999 |
I think my husband is one of those that escaped this damaging stereotype,
which btw gay men also suffer from. However, he is (and admits it)
notoriously hard on himself. Whenever I suggest that I am fat he is
immendiately militant in telling me that I am beautiful and sexy and that I
don't need to lose annny weight. When his mother suggested to me that I ought
to lose some weight, he got so upset I had a real difficult time stopping him
from going to tell his mother off. He, on the other hand, accepts her
criticism of his weight with a pain that is very visible. Every time she and
her parents (much worse than her) mention his weight, I just want to strangle
them. They have him considering diuretics and other harmful things. It's
a wonder that he hasn't gotten some kind of eating disorder or something.
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orinoco
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response 19 of 69:
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Jun 19 21:23 UTC 1999 |
I'd never realized how difficult a topic weight is to discus until
I re-read this item. When I'm giving a physical description of a friend,
there are only two terms that I can think of that I feel uncomfortable using:
"black" and "overweight". I had taken it for granted that the word "black"
could be awkward to use, since it has a huge range of meaning (appearance,
culture, parents, identity, used as a compliment, used as an insult, etc...)
and it's pretty heavily politicized. But I hadn't expected "overweight" to
be just as awkward until, after reading this again, I noticed myself
hesitating to use it just as much.
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bookworm
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response 20 of 69:
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Jun 19 21:33 UTC 1999 |
I've noticed that more and more myself. I constantly refer to Jon as my
teddybear and "cuddly". Chubby people are more fun because there's more to
hug.
Never thought I'd be a fat activist, but thinking about all the folks that
get down on other people because of weight problems just makes me burn!
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i
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response 21 of 69:
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Jun 20 12:09 UTC 1999 |
People are the most eager to do discretionary spending when they're
dissatisfied with themselves and trying to "fix it". The "pushing
inflatomatic junk food at you everywhere" then tell you "thin is the
only way to be in" things is just another part of capitalism's Dark Side.
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bookworm
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response 22 of 69:
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Jun 20 17:09 UTC 1999 |
Sounds about right.
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otter
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response 23 of 69:
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Jun 24 01:48 UTC 1999 |
ref #19, 20: Assuming you have no problem describing someone as "thin", what
makes you hesitate to use the word "fat"? "Overweight" sounds, to me, like
the person has made a mistake or done something wrong - gone over.
Same with "weight problem". Some people are thin, some are fat, short, tall,
blonde, etc. We will all be a lot better off by working on changing our
thinking a bit, maybe starting with the words we use.
By the way, I'm fat. And gorgeous. 8^)
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scott
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response 24 of 69:
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Jun 24 02:24 UTC 1999 |
But you could be "fat" without really being "overweight". Or could you? How
is "overweight" defined? I tend to look to the viewpoint about where the
amount of body fat becomes a health risk. That is definitely overweight.
I dunno. I sometimes wonder how people with, say, 40% (a guess) or greater
body fat can stand to haul all that stuff around. But then I've learned (my
first bonafide "wisdom") that the worst/dumbest assumption you can make about
other people is that they share the same tastes as yourself. So maybe my own
strange (possibly hereditary) compulsion to exercise often would be worse than
just being fat?
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bookworm
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response 25 of 69:
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Jun 24 18:35 UTC 1999 |
I've seen TONS of people who I would call underweight most definitely.
It's a pity skinny is in.
I wonder if people would feel the same if someone they knew was in the
hospital for anorexia nervosa.
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orinoco
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response 26 of 69:
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Jun 24 19:51 UTC 1999 |
Re#23: Exactly - it's not a rational response, any more than it's rational
to call someone "white" and then feel squeamish about calling someone else
"black". That's why I think it's so interesting that I do respond that way.
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beeswing
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response 27 of 69:
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Jun 25 15:22 UTC 1999 |
A friend of mine was indeed hospitalized for anorexia. As in, feeding
tube. It was a horrible thing to witness.
I'm at the point where I just don't care anymore. No, I don't want to
binge on Twinkies in the name of apathy. It's more that the whole body
obsession thing no longer means much to me. I still want to take care of
myself and eat well. Yes, I could stand to lose some, how many couldn't?
I'm beautiful and that's all there is to it, thankyouverymuch. :)
If you are clinically obese (or overfat or whatever you wish to call it)
and are happy with it, great. More power to you. But when I see someone
profoundly overweight, it does make me wonder how it feels to carry all
that around. It looks uncomfortable.
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beeswing
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response 28 of 69:
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Jun 25 15:23 UTC 1999 |
... or as they say on AbFab, "I'm thin and gorgeous!!" :)
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bookworm
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response 29 of 69:
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Jun 25 18:33 UTC 1999 |
As I would reply, "Well, I'm relatively average and I'm still gorgeous!!"
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