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Author Message
25 new of 563 responses total.
jiffer
response 328 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 02:51 UTC 2006

IHB my state income tax return arrived! woohoo! Money! All of $38
jadecat
response 329 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 14:24 UTC 2006

resp:327 Yup, Anne got married almost 5 months ago. Thanks. :)
nharmon
response 330 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 14:35 UTC 2006

IHB the USA won the Silver Medal in the two-woman Bobsled. This was one 
of my events in Coca-Cola's Drink.Watch.Cheer.Win. sweepstakes. In 
about 8-10 weeks I should be getting a coupon redeemable for 5 2-liters 
of any Coca-Cola product. GO TEAM USA!
slynne
response 331 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 15:06 UTC 2006

IHB I just got back from a really nice week in California. Nothing like 
a little vacation to make February less dismal. 
jep
response 332 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 15:28 UTC 2006

My step-kids' visitation has been suspended.  They don't have to go to 
their dad's house for a few weeks, at least, pending court action about 
our charges of parental abuse.  This is because my stepson said his dad 
hit him, on the first weekend he visited his dad after his mother 
married me.
edina
response 333 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 15:43 UTC 2006

My immediate response is "yay!" and "Thank God".  I hope you and yours are
weathering the storm ok.
keesan
response 334 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 16:54 UTC 2006

I hope John can try to be understanding of how his stepkids' father is
feeling, having gone through something similar when his ex-wife married
someone else.  Some people act on their feelings when they are upset.  

I am happy that we are having glorious February weather, perfect for biking.
I took a short ride along the river yesterday and saw many pairs of geese
defending their small territories on the two islets near the old canoe livery,
one pair of swans, and a lot of crows, and some melting ice, and a few
runners.
edina
response 335 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 16:56 UTC 2006

Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES does how you are feeling about your ex ever get to
bleed over into how you interact with your child - especially if that involves
hitting.
jadecat
response 336 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:00 UTC 2006

What Brooke said.

Being mad, oh sure. Hitting your child because you're mad. No sirree. No
how is that acceptable.
nharmon
response 337 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:03 UTC 2006

I agree with Brooke and Anne. That guy's right to get angry stops at 
his kid's body. Physically striking your child out of anger teaches 
them that is the proper way to deal with emotions.

I'm always shaking my head at parents who hit their children and then 
are surprised when their children hit them back.
mcnally
response 338 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:25 UTC 2006

> That guy's right to get angry stops at his kid's body.

Well before, actually.
richard
response 339 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:27 UTC 2006

why was visitation suspended altogether?  couldn't it have been limited to
"supervised visitation" until the proceeding?  meaning the boy's mother has
to go over there with him when he visits?
tod
response 340 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:29 UTC 2006

I have to disagree with all of you.  (Just because I can see it will stir
things up.)  8D
edina
response 341 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:29 UTC 2006

That's not suprevised visitation, and when you think it through, probably one
that will simply inflame the situation.  Supervised is when you have someone
trained in dealing with these kinds of situations supervising the visit
(social worker, parent aide, etc.)
edina
response 342 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:30 UTC 2006

Todd slipped.  Damn him.  Damn him to hell.  (Disagreeable ass!)  ;-)
keesan
response 343 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:32 UTC 2006

I did not say violence was excusable, just that John ought to understand how
ex-fathers can have violent feelings.  In his case the feelings were towards
his ex's new husband, not the kids, and he did not act on them.
richard
response 344 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:37 UTC 2006

also kids can exaggerate situations, particularly when it involves parents
and he/she is trying to gain favor or attention with one parent over another.
you say "hitting" and it has all sorts of connotations, if you said "slapping"
or "spanking" could it be exaggerated into "hitting">
happyboy
response 345 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:40 UTC 2006

what proof is there that he hit the kid?
edina
response 346 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:44 UTC 2006

Richard, while I can see you are trying to be "helpful", I find what you are
saying so, STUPID.  First off, I'm pretty sure John and his wife are aware
of this.  Secondly, if they didn't report it and the child said somethign in
school, the child could be removed from *both* homes for his own safety. 
Schools are mandatory reporters.

Kids do lie.  Kids exaggerate.  We all know this - we've all been there.  That
being said, I don't doubt John and his judgment in this situation.  And the
fact that you are doing your "red herring dance of love" yet again....well,
I find it offensive.
tod
response 347 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:46 UTC 2006

What proof is there that the kid didn't deserve a whack for something else?
nharmon
response 348 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:51 UTC 2006

SPARE THA ROD AND SPOILT THE CHILD
edina
response 349 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:52 UTC 2006

First off, what's a "whack"?  Secondly, how old is the kid?  Thirdly, if you
were in a contentious split with your ex, would you HONESTLY hit your child,
knowing it could cost you visitation with your child?  You can bitch and moan
about how it doesn't allow you to parent your child YOUR way, but bottom line
is that after a certain point in time, hitting your child ceases to be
effective.  There are a million other ways to punish a child besides hitting.
happyboy
response 350 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:57 UTC 2006

what proof is there that the kid was hit?
nharmon
response 351 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 17:59 UTC 2006

> would you HONESTLY hit your child, knowing it could cost you 
> visitation with your child?

Some people have problems controlling their emotions, and lash out 
irrationally.
edina
response 352 of 563: Mark Unseen   Feb 23 18:00 UTC 2006

And they should not be allowed to see their children unsupervised.
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