response 22 of 56:

Feb 6 18:58 UTC 2002

        Experimentation is never simple, Greg.  You know this!

        I'm not so clear on the line you're drawing here, Julie, either.  There
are a lot of things that people might initially have an aversion to that, as
long as it's not a strict aversion, they might well enjoy if they try it. 
As long as there's no threatening, if one person talks another person into
something, or simply experiments with the understanding that in a healthy
relationship you can always ask your partner to stop, then what's the harm?
Where is the line you're drawing?

        Personally, I've found that riding in between what a person knows that
they like, and what they've fantasized about, but perhaps never really
confronted, is the best place to be.  You do have to be careful not to go into
really offensive or disturbing territory, but most of that has to do with
fetishism anyways, and assuming neither partner is a fetishist, you're
generally safe.

response 24 of 56:

Feb 7 02:58 UTC 2002

I am assuming, of course, that the people will discuss the possibility 
first, especially in the realm of fantasy.  The couple would have to 
agree that it was alright to say "no" or on a safe word so that if one 
partner began to feel uncomfortable they would both stop.  All I'm 
saying is, just assuming that the person is just shy and trying to talk 
them over when they've already said no is, IMO, crossing the line.  Jon 
and I have had this same discussion with regards to his occasional 
desires to have me be his Dom.  I am not really into that.  Jon is a 
gentleman and has not attempted to talk me around to doing it anyway.  
There have been times when I have suggested it myself jsut because I 
knew he liked it.  So, I would think that, once the suggestion was on 
the rug, the reluctant partner would have the opportunity to consider 
it after having already said no and might, later, say yes.

response 26 of 56:

Feb 7 16:32 UTC 2002

heh.

response 28 of 56:

Feb 7 19:20 UTC 2002

resp:25 I think that may have been what I was trying to say.  Very well 
put.  I just don't think people should be manipulated.  And that goes 
for people you know as well as those you've just met, especially in the 
area of sex and regardless of whether its BDSM or eating peanut butter 
between their toes.  You should at least talk about it and find out WHY 
they don't want to.  Then you can make in roads towards settling their 
concerns.  If that doesn't help, give up and do something else.  That's 
my opinion.

response 30 of 56:

Feb 8 16:54 UTC 2002

        It makes sense, but it's ... outside my personal experience.  Maybe
it has something to do with the people I've been with, but then again, it's
been fairly consistent with all of them.

        I don't know about the odds of two people being horny at the same time,
but the odds of two people being convincable if their partner seems to be so,
seems to be fairly high.  But, in thinking about it, it's difficult to be
absolutely sure, since many people are uncomfortable expressing sexual
interest in clear terms, and it's less common for one person to really clearly
initiate things in my book.  But then, perhaps I've had a long string of
nymphomaniacs.  I don't know.

response 32 of 56:

Feb 8 20:37 UTC 2002

my partners not always horny at the same time i am, but i know how to change
that.

response 34 of 56:

Feb 8 23:35 UTC 2002

maybe.

response 36 of 56:

Feb 9 22:41 UTC 2002

are you callin my man a ho?!?

response 38 of 56:

Feb 10 19:12 UTC 2002

<laughs> Jon is fairly easy to swing over, too, oval.  It has a lot to 
do with the way men are wired.  If men were wired the way women are 
there would be lots less children and the human race would be a dying 
breed.

response 40 of 56:

Feb 11 04:29 UTC 2002

        There are some pretty noticeable biological differences;  the
development of the visual cortex, the development of the corpus callosum, the
flexibility and load-bearing characteristics of the spine.  Male children and
female children - long before they're capable of language - react differently
to stress.

        And yet a lot of things that we associate with male or female roles
are reversed in, say, traditional Iranian culture.

        Hmm.

        Okay, no point there. ;)

        Whatever the cause is, if you're a "pursuer" then you're used to
motivating yourself, and it usually isn't a factor.  If you're "pursued", one
of the indirect choices you have is when and where, and you're used to
unmotivating yourself.

        The real fun starts when people realise the game can be reversed. ;)

response 42 of 56:

Feb 11 18:32 UTC 2002

Not that I would WANT it that way.  I'm rather happy with the way 
males and females dovetail, thanks.

response 44 of 56:

Feb 11 20:19 UTC 2002

dude, it depends on the body type.
warning, this is quite base and graphic.
i've had the disctinct pleasure to sample a fair number of the fairer
sexes hospitality, and well, i've got some field conclusions here.
types of women: nervious and tight:
this is your classic up tight prude, or even some of the more pragmatic
or party girlies out there, but for some reason she's had bas sexual experinces
(tendency to emit female ejaculate, or still suffering guilt/shame reactions)
or outright sexual abuse. barring medical psychological conditions she can be
dry, or tight from clencing up and is generally more of a foreplay/backrub
gal. sometimes it's one of the rare women wired wrong (i.e. certian eroginus
zones, well, arn't) example was a gf i had who's vagina wasn't sensative at
all. it just did nothing, but her back and breasts were extra wired. she LOVED
foreplay and backrubs, and intercourse was...well..pointless for her. type I 

willing but hard to get ready: this is your average unmolsted or fairly well
adjusted teenage girl. she's ready and willing, but it can take a bit for her
to get relaxed and or moist enough for da happy groove and generally is your
average girlie. not much to be said except proceede with caution and don't ruin
'er. type II

built for scruping: these are my personal favourites: always moist, never get's
sore, always ready for more. these are the people that could make ron jeremy
beg for a breather.  gods i do love them so.  i tell you they're men with
vaginas type III

noteble things of each?
type I: usually very hard to orgasim, orgasims are "forced" because of
psychological issues, usually becomes sore VERY quickly either due to lack of
lubrication or being overly tight. sometimes it's because they require
thearapy.. type II: can become one of the other two types depending on
experinces, and physiology type III: dear gods if your a guy i hope you marry
one like this if you can keep up:) trouble is they usually tend to be
sensualists and VERY high maintinence. hope you've got more to offer than your
bedroom skills, or she'll be  moving on sooner or later