(your best friend is getting married. s/he wants you to be the best man/
bridesmaid. you think the marriage is a terrible idea.)

(do you accept?)

15 responses total.

Yes.  Whether I agree with his/her choice of a spouse has no bearing.
I was asked to be an attendant becuase of my friendship with one 
person, not because of my opinion about his/her intended.
.[D

Yes. It's not the same as being the driver for a bank robbery, you know!

Yes, I would do it and agree with #1 & #2.

I would decline only if I was willing to lose the friendship.
And I think that the friendship would be significantly damaged
if not completely ruined.  I don't know if I could stand up for 
a friend if I *knew* they were doing the wrong thing.  But....
how do I know it is the wrong thing?

I'd only decline if I objected to the marriage on grounds of 
principle, like knowing my friend was already married or
something.  I'm trying to think of any other "grounds of
principle" that would make me feel like a marriage was actually
wrong, and I can't thing of any.  Can anyone else?

(would a marriage of convenience fit under the "wrong" category?)

Whose convenience?  I guess if I just felt uneasy, I'd plead
one of those excuses like "But I always wash my hair on 
Saturday nights".

<grin>

(actually, I was referring to marriage whose purpose is solely
something as shallow as power consolidation, whether that
power be political, financial, or some other sort.)

Actually, it depends on how big the wedding was going to be.
If it was going to be a big to-do with  "all the trimmings",
I would plead my natural distaste for spotlights and get out of
it.  If it was just-beyond-an-elopement, I would be honest about
my opinions & say "If you still want me to stand up with you, I'm
game".  If I'm right that the marriage is a mistake, my friend
is going to need her friends and I'd rather not alienate her  
unnecessarily.  Also, maybe I'm wrong ...  it happens.

Yes.  If we're such close friends, she'd already know my feelings and
would have asked me in spite of that.  I'm not marrying the 
brute anyway.

I recently had to do just that. My best friend got married to a girl
I thought was a bad choice. He asked me to be best man and I said
yes. They now have a kid and are very much in love.

yes

Yes.  If it's what he/she wants, my opinion of his/her fiance(e) is
irrelevant.  I'd do it if it's what will make my best friend happy.

Yep

Accept, but throw up on the ring, at the crucial moment.

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