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I'm not this prolific, really. I've been having this neat period of strong inspiration and time to work things out, the end result of which is that I've produced more (and arguably better) poetry in the past few days than in the rest of my life. Inspiration sometimes sucks, though; someone pointed out earlier in this conference that some of the greatest works of art are produced out of the deepest pain. Today my cat died, my beautiful Phil. This, combined with the fact that I've been reading the poetry of Swinburne (which, while incredibly lyrical and beautiful, is completely morbid; he talks about death incessantly) led to the following poem. It definitely needs work, but this will qualify as a first draft, and has its shining moments, I think. This one's for you, Phil. Candledark When candles die, The tragedy is not The tenrils of the fragrant smoke they leave, Nor darkness where their cozy glow once shone. For smoke can bear away my prayers to God And darkness is no punishment, for one Who longs for solitude, to cry alone. No, the tragedy of sudden candledark Is loneliness, where once the cherished flame bequeathed to me its tiny, selfless warmth As though it understood my voiceless groan. No, when days die, and darkness covers all There is no loss. Light comes again, and soon: Against it, Night cannot but fail ere long. I know this, yet when sunset's fire is gone And Night's cold essence wraps me roundabout, And sleep's oblivion is not yet come, My solace, comforter, my tiny dawn, My candle flame keeps company with me. Together, vigil seems less burdensome, and Night becomes a cloak to keep us warm. Eventually, all candles gutter, all men die. All wicks grow short, all wax runs cold and dull, All muscles freeze, all kindly thoughts are stilled. All loves grow feeble, all lights fail in time; The sun, that candle of the Lord's first Night, It too will burn out when its fuel is gone. Oh, what is Man, that knowledge of his fate Is granted him? What candle lights the way Past death; is there another dawn of life? What lessons can we learn, when candles die? Would it be better not to know our doom? The candle, pure and innocent, it lives Its short, sweet life in ignorance of death; Could we not live as sweetly if we could But lose this gruesome knowledge that we know? Achilles once was given such a choice, Between a long and comfortable life And glory, fire, sacrifice, and death. His choice defaulted; anger for a friend Made his decision for him, shaped his end. And our ends too are shaped in such a way. All people walk their ways in chosen paths And know the consequences of their deeds. The vengeance of Achilles was his choice; Our choices more mundane, are just as proud. Our knowledge is more dear to us than life. If candles knew their fate, but burned on still, How much more noble would their effort be! When Death stops for me, my comfort thus will go: Each action in my life was made by choice.
3 responses total.
I like the reversals in this one most of all: "candledark" instead of candlelight, "night cannot but fail" where the usual phrase refers to the light failing, "night becomes a cloak to keep us warm" instead of the usual cold and darkness thing. And I'm jealous of anyone who can make iambic pentameter sound this natural - This Means You...
oh my god... <erinnn bursts into tears>
<birdy cries and cries> Oh, Greg... =( My kitty was perched in my arms like a baby as usual and the line about unconditional warmth reminded me of all the times he climbs into my lap when I'm stressed, causing me to go numb and quiet due to his warmth and energy. I am so sorry about Phil. <huggles> This was a beautiful tribute.
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