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Grex Helpers Item 48: System Problems Item. Please attempt to rhyme where possible. [linked]
Entered by popcorn on Mon Sep 23 13:50:07 UTC 1996:

In the immortal words of Daniel A. "keats" Napolitano:
 
   cyberspace.org. sat on a wall,
   cyberspace.org. had a great fall,
   and all despite remmers and all of his ken
   it was days before we were online once again!

231 responses total.



#1 of 231 by robh on Tue Sep 24 15:05:52 1996:

This item, which I really think
is good for helpers, now has a link
to Intro.  Isn't that just pink?


#2 of 231 by eeyore on Tue Sep 24 16:27:54 1996:

this is sick!!!!!!  :)


#3 of 231 by snafu on Tue Sep 24 18:31:51 1996:

The point being??


#4 of 231 by kaplan on Tue Sep 24 18:32:08 1996:

Robh is confused.
He made a small goof.
This item is linked 
to helpers not intro.



#5 of 231 by robh on Tue Sep 24 19:20:57 1996:

robh could always link it to Intro too
But saying "Helpers, not Intro" here should do.


#6 of 231 by kewy on Tue Sep 24 20:31:20 1996:

please tell how toolist a directory
comply and my quest will be history
(it didn't ryhme, so kill me, i tried>


#7 of 231 by jor on Tue Sep 24 21:29:57 1996:

from here you might do an !ls -alt
or hit !man ls and read what you'll see

pretty bad



#8 of 231 by popcorn on Wed Sep 25 02:41:35 1996:

!pilot and !filebrowse
other ways to list your files is.

(Gads that was bad.)


#9 of 231 by bmoran on Wed Sep 25 04:25:27 1996:

Bad it was
And bad it will be
Lets take this rhyming
'n throw it in the sea.


#10 of 231 by wolfg676 on Wed Sep 25 11:23:45 1996:

After dealing with my own system making me mental,
I threatened my modem with problems dental.
A jumper swtich here, and cleaning there,
I no longer felt the need to pull out my hair.
ATDT was the command I did see,
And LO! My modem responded to me!
The line, it did ring...and ring,
slowly diminishing my faith in the abilities of this thing.
So, "Cancel" I clicked,
thinking my modem had somehow been tricked.
Badly in need of slumber,
I rechecked the number.
Aha! The number's not wrong,
The modem at 761-5041 must not be on!
And so I dialed 761-5159,
Connecting to another 9600 line.
And things on both ends seem to be running just fine. :)



#11 of 231 by janc on Wed Sep 25 13:25:36 1996:

One of Grex's modems wasn't answering last night
So scott killed it's getty and now it's all right.


#12 of 231 by remmers on Wed Sep 25 15:23:13 1996:

        Thrice this morn hath backtalk
        My login and password rejected;
        Can one truly say that
        A problem hath been detected?



#13 of 231 by scott on Wed Sep 25 16:08:32 1996:

Backtalk is not enabled,
a security hole was not just fabled!
Jan thinks he will fix it soon,
perhaps before the next full moon.


#14 of 231 by robh on Wed Sep 25 16:45:55 1996:

janc had better hurry, or there will be some sorrow;
The next full moon just happens to be tomorrow.
(A total lunar eclipse, too, for those who care to view
From 9'ish to 12:30'ish, it should be good.  Woo-hoo!)


#15 of 231 by eskarina on Wed Sep 25 20:06:05 1996:

<thinks too many people have read the thing about "What if Dr. Seuss wrote
Star Trek>


#16 of 231 by jor on Wed Sep 25 23:52:35 1996:

        Only on Grex, could SysProblems rhyme,
        On future reports, I will take more time.


#17 of 231 by snafu on Wed Sep 25 23:57:24 1996:

ARRRGGGHHH!!! Enough already.....


#18 of 231 by bjorn on Thu Sep 26 03:02:43 1996:

Chagrin feels poor snafu,
affected as if, by bad haiku.


#19 of 231 by giry on Thu Sep 26 03:22:06 1996:

        It was not a happy day
        When my friend janay
        Could not sent me a tel
        For reasons she could not tell
        She was on ttyre
        If that will help in the remedy.

  Boy that was tough


#20 of 231 by srw on Thu Sep 26 06:54:51 1996:

The problem is this.
The system doesn't need repair.
It's these silly rhymes.


#21 of 231 by birdlady on Thu Sep 26 13:22:40 1996:

There is nothing wrong
With speaking in song.
It's a creative way
To change what you say
Into verse and prose,
I do suppose.
So continue in haste.
Put no words to waste.
And always remember
Your iambic pentameter.

<birdy curtseys>


#22 of 231 by philoman on Thu Sep 26 16:17:31 1996:

Today I am grexxing from work,
The lag is like eating soup with a fork.
If my connection is poor,
I'll try it once more,
but I won't give up on it like a dork.

<Conan straightens his tie and pushes his specs up his nose>


#23 of 231 by jor on Thu Sep 26 17:13:00 1996:

Yes I know, it seems slow, 70 users in tow


#24 of 231 by janc on Thu Sep 26 19:51:20 1996:

I have this query
For our friend giry:
What message, if any,
Was displayed to janay?

When something fails,
Please give details!


#25 of 231 by giry on Fri Sep 27 04:48:56 1996:

It is hard to give details
When something fails
When you don't have the time
To find a suitable rhyme

My friend janay had this to say:
It tells me you aren't logged on today.
That is wrong because 
I surely was.
        [Translation: I was sitting right next to her, and on grex and it todl
her that giry wasn't logged on, she tried it with another friend also with
the same result.]


#26 of 231 by margs on Sat Sep 28 20:10:50 1996:

does anyone know the copacabana?


#27 of 231 by bjorn on Sun Sep 29 16:09:55 1996:

Sorry to say,
I can't say "yes" today.


#28 of 231 by janc on Sun Sep 29 17:14:17 1996:

Re #25:
  On a midnight dark and dreary
  Janc muttered, "I've no theory."


#29 of 231 by otter on Sun Sep 29 22:29:14 1996:

This is getting really wild
I am again today an unknown child.
The rest of the message: 26894:Exit0
The person who rights this will be my hero.


#30 of 231 by russ on Mon Sep 30 04:50:49 1996:

Then I guess I am your man;
You ran something from PicoSpan.
The process ran until its end
And its status tried to send.
But PicoSpan had been exec'ed
And thus has your composure wrecked
For when it got its signal due
The reason why, it had no clue.


#31 of 231 by birdlady on Mon Sep 30 13:28:07 1996:

<birdy sings Copacabana for whomever requested it>

Her name was Lola.
She was a showgirl.
Yellow ribbons in her hair
and a dress cut down to there.

That's all I know.  =)


#32 of 231 by raven on Mon Sep 30 21:59:50 1996:

My test comes in fragments 
because of Grex's overloaded magnets

 5:57pm  up 3 days,  2:56,  67 users,  load average: 25.88, 19.27, 18.35  


#33 of 231 by popcorn on Mon Sep 30 23:50:11 1996:

Ja, I don't know why,
but all day the load av has been high.


#34 of 231 by raven on Tue Oct 1 01:22:13 1996:

err text that is


#35 of 231 by arthurp on Wed Oct 2 01:07:49 1996:

Very much so of late.
I've learned to hate
the pace of the snail
caused my all that mail.


#36 of 231 by raven on Wed Oct 2 02:38:38 1996:

        If Grex's load average doth remain high
        I think I shall break down and cry

10:34pm  up 4 days,  7:33,  63 users,  load average: 20.68, 14.63, 12.64 


#37 of 231 by rcurl on Wed Oct 2 05:16:22 1996:

12:43am  up 4 days,  9:43,  51 users,  load average: 8.88, 8.23, 8.58

For 51 users, that load average is big
My computer is surely not doing a jig.


#38 of 231 by fitz on Wed Oct 2 09:10:52 1996:

                        Is it me or is it grex?
                                I can't see all the text,
                        When browsing in the agora,
                                Of the item list criteria.

                        Items one through fifteen have been seen
                                (It's all there is on the first screen),
                        But sixteen to nineteen roll right past,
                                Leaving items twenty to "OK:" at the last.

                        The humor item has disappeared.
                                (I thought that *that* was really weird.)
                        I entered "b" repeatedly,
                                But inbetweens I could not see.

                        Oh! Can viri and bacteria
                                Infect the cherished Agora?
                        (Suspiciously I note that "rhymes"
                                sounds a bit like the evil "Good Times."


#39 of 231 by janc on Wed Oct 2 16:27:03 1996:

Emulating fitz and cows
In agora I did browse.
Every item there was seen
Even "humor" in sixteen.

I'm not sure, but I would wager,
there's a problem with your pager.
It thinks your screen has twenty-four lines,
while I suspect you've less, or more lines,
and so the twenty-fifth gets eaten,
which is the line 16 has its seat in.

Go thou now and count thy lines, fitz
Find the number that thy screen fits.
   If there' thirty-two,
   the command to do:
   "!stty rows 32".
That's as good as Unix gets.


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