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Got this from the Baby Center Website http://www.babycenter.com "Georgina says, 'I really want to breastfeed my baby, but my husband thinks it's disgusting. I feel like I'm not allowed to do it without his support. How can I change his mind?' Do you have advice for Georgina? Share it here!" Ideas, Questions, Opinions?
21 responses total.
How about asking if he would prefer to bottle feed the baby (that he do all the work, not her)? Change husbands instead of minds?
<boggles> Interesting. It wouldn't even have occurred to me to be disgusted by breastfeeding. Of all the body shame issues I've run across, this has to be one of the strangest. Maybe I've just lived in Ann Arbor too long. As far as "not allowed to do it without his support" ... I'm really not sure what to think of that. Part of me is saying, "Well of course they should both have a say in how the child is raised. If he's the father, his opinion matters too, even if it's a little odd." But a bigger part of me just thinks he's a creep. The combination of "breastfeeding is yucky" and "raise my kid the way I tell you to raise him" doesn't exactly make me picture a progressive, equality-minded husband looking to take his fair share of the responsibility. And ... well, on the one hand, the baby's health is the most persuasive argument. If the father were an anti-immunization zealot, I'd feel pretty strongly in favor of giving the kid his shots anyway. But that's one extreme. At the other extreme are arguments like "you're endangering your daughter by not fighting to get her into an expensive preschool" that just make me laugh. Breastfeeding falls somewhere between being a yuppie hangup and being an essential health benefit, and I'm not sure how much intervention it justifies. Good question.
I suspect there are much bigger issues here than breast feeding. Bringing an infant into a relationship, especially the first infant, can take an otherwise nice relationship into some pretty weird areas. They need to talk.
If he finds breastfeeding disgusting, I wonder how they ever managed to conceive a baby.
Depending on what Mr. Bottle's *real* reasons are, some approaches:
- talk to some of the older folks in his family & let them talk to him
- assure him that you'll have sex with him just as often as before, *so
long as* he'll help with the baby by doing tasks A, B, C, D, ...
- explain to him that breast feeding is pretty discreet, and does not
involve baring your chest to crowds of strangers.
- offer to use a pump so that he can have his fair share of feeding (using
a bottle)
- find out if he also opposes dirty diapers, holding a baby that may ulp
on him, etc.
I was telling a friend about this item, and she said "Of course he's got problems with it. Up until the baby came along, that was _his_ breast." That's one way to look at it, I guess.
There are two, can't they share?
Your response just boggled my mind.
yeah, that's a good one ( resp:7 )
Well the biologic jealousy is not bad. I like the question, because it's certainly not a nice subject between the partners. Try early irritations to solve, they draw other irritations. My way is talking about it from various direction. How does it feel the different moments for the woman, how long. The man can tell what he feels, but he must stay quiet, not enlarging his feelings or disgust. He had to learn to deal with it, give it a place, rephrasing many times, drawing, if likes that. Talking about it, but always so that the problem minimizes. Yes, don't neglect it, other problems for other moments. In this way I see it. Good question! Thank you. Ed
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Yes, I know, something in Europe called "Liege lait". Yes, I agree completely with it. But my point was a way acceptance by the husband. Valerie, I can't post anymore in you diary, that's good, but would Kendra like a nice warm bath, ot did you try this already. In my view feeling safe is a keyword.
The club is a women club with the correct name "La Lait Leige". Your choice is very good for the child, and also for youself! And I hope so it will go well for your children and soon for Julie, please send her lovely mails. My heart is with you Valerie, life isn't easy.
Julie, please email me safeandwarm@hotmail.com. let us look how high the risks are, you deserve really to get more certainty. And please enjoy to get a new baby, please Julie email me early.
I think you are thinking of "la Leche League" They have that here in the States, too.
Yes you are right I recognize now the word picture (English?) Please mail me. safeandwarm@hotmail.com That's a good thing. Are they also gathering urine for seprating a hormone for other women, I don't know what exactly, in the US. I am not sure the same La Leche League does the gathering. I know LLL provides information, which is very useful, I think. Please give breasrmilk idf you can, better for child and better for you. I'm so glad you posted this. I posted what you maybe can expect, but please email me maybe the risks are for you lower. But please trust me.
Thanks for the vote of confidence. Not only had I planned on it, I realize that it is also the least expensive thing for me and the baby to do.
YES! Julie, maybe this isn't my business according to you, but your postings don't show anything of serious risks. You have according my knowledge probably a very light form. One thing it's also good among other nice things, to think and communcate a lot with from time to time (often) new elements. Feeling yourself happy and communicating new things are the very strong points of my L'+F' relationship. It's my last hint I can give you probably. Have a very nice time, no, many, many years of happiness, And it's completely true, I trust you indeed.
hum. thanks. I guess.
Okay, I hope we're even now. You know I wish many things for you. I'm a little bit charming you know.
was this loper?
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