how do u find out if a woman wearing skirt is wearing panties or not?
ans:  by checking out for the dandruff in her legs!

16 responses total.

I don't get it.

This response has been erased.

jacklumen hereis the explanation
if a lady wears panties the dandruff rrom her pubic hair never falls on her
feet
where as if she doesnt wear ther would be dandruff all over her feet.

This response has been erased.

llamma's in the house!

That joke could apply to mean as well . . . after all, us dudes tend to not
keep our pubic regions as clean as the lasses. 

        That's a joke, right?

Just the fax, Ma'am ...

Q. Do I have to be married to have safe fax?
A. Although married people fax often, 
    there are many single people who fax complete strangers every day.

Q. How do I go about faxing a complete stranger?
A. Just ask them if they want to fax. 
    If they do, they will give you their phone number.

Q. My parents say they never had fax when they were young, and were only
    allowed to write memo's to each other until they were 21. 
    How old do you think someone should be before they can fax?
A. Faxing can be performed at any age once you learn the correct procedure.

Q. If I fax something to myself will I go blind?
A. Certainly not. As far as we can see.

Q. There is a place on our street where you can go and pay to fax. 
    Is this legal?
A. Yes, many people have no other outlet for their fax drives
    and must pay a "professional" when their needs become too great.

Q. Should a cover always be used for faxing?
A. Unless you are really sure of the one you are faxing, 
    a cover should always be used.

Q. What happens if I do the procedure incorrectly and fax prematurely?
A. Don't panic. Many people fax prematurely when they haven't faxed 
    in a long time. Just start over, most people won't mind if you try again.

Q. I have a personal and a business fax. Can transmissions become mixed up?
A. Being bi-faxual can be confusing, but so long as you use a cover 
    with each one you won't transmit anything you're not supposed to.

Q. Is getting faxed by one person the same as with another?
A. No. Even though many people (especially lawyers) would like you to believe
    that the longer they are faxing you the better you will like it. 
    In reality the best fax is short, of high quality, and very graphic.

Q. There is a man I'd very much like to fax (I've tried several times)
    but he can't seem to keep his equipment up long enough.
    Is there any thing I can do to help him?
A. You could suggest that he contact a good fax therapist, such as Canon 
    or Mitsubishi. If he refuses to take the suggestion, it would be best
    if you just wrote him off.

Please practice safe fax!

Umm...

w00t

Yeah.

They forgot to add that some people do mass faxes, but its usually polite to
ask first.

SOCIAL SECURITY SEX

Two men were talking.
"So, how's your sex life?"
"Oh, nothing special. I'm having Social Security sex."
"Social Security sex?"
"Yeah, you know: I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!"

LOUD SEX

A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem, doctor.
Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear 
splitting yell."
"My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely natural. I don't see what 
the problem is."
"The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"

QUIET SEX

Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during
a recent lovemaking session,
"How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She glanced at him casually and replied, "You're never home!"

CONFOUNDED SEX

A man was in a terrible accident, and his manhood was mangled and torn from
his body.  His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his
manhood, but that his insurance wouldn't cover the surgery, since it was 
considered cosmetic.
The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for "small, $6,500 for "medium, 
$14,000 for "large." The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the
doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision.
The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options.
The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected.
"Well, what have the two of you decided?" asked the doctor.
The man answered, "She'd rather remodel the kitchen".

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY SEX

A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding
anniversary.
The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'."
"Yeah," she replies, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone reads:
'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"

WOMEN'S HUMOR

My husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly and said, "This will make you
happy tonight."
He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the
doorknobs.
He couldn't get back in.


A couple is lying in bed. 
The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."
The woman says..... "I'll miss you."

Man goes to the doctor, seeking advice on how to add some spice to his sex
life.  The doctor, after listening to his description of his sex, suggested
making a loud noise or some other distraction at a key moment, to startle his
wife and perhaps get her to focus more on what was happening.  The doctor was
thanked but later rethough his advice when he got the following letter:
 
Dear Sir:
Per your current advice when I was intimate with my wife last night, I fired
off my rifle at the key moment in the hopes of startling her into greater
excitement.  As a result, my wife in shock shat the bed, nearly bit off my
dick, my neighbor came out of the closet with his hands up, and the block on
the car is shot out. 

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, "Father, I have a problem:
I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest inquired.

They say, "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

"That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed, then he thought for a moment.

"You know," he said, "I may have a solution to your problem. I have two
male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible. 
Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage
with Frank and Jacob.  My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship,
and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time."

"Thank you," the woman responded, "this may very well be the solution."

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house.  
As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their
cage, holding rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and 
placed her parrots in with them. After a few minutes, the female parrots
cried out in unison:

"Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

There was stunned silence. Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the
other male parrot and exclaimed, "Put the beads away, Frank: Our prayers have
been answered!"

Cute.  :)

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