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Grex > Coop13 > #101: Cyberspace Communications finances for January 2004 | |
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| 25 new of 155 responses total. |
tod
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response 66 of 155:
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Feb 12 21:27 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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slynne
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response 67 of 155:
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Feb 12 21:28 UTC 2004 |
resp:65 Yes! That is just it. I have learned how to deal with unhealthy
types of social interaction. It's a skill. And one I happen to like
because it allows me to take more social risks than I might otherwise.
I have my safe places where all the social interaction is safe and
healthy and wonderful and all of that. I see grex as being more public
than that. I share a lot here but I dont share everything because this
is a place where jerks can come in. HOwever, I have met some of my
closest friends online. People with whom I can have safe private
conversations with. People I can share my deepest secrets and pain
with. People I wouldnt have in my life if m-net/grex were closed
systems. Those people are so important to me that I think it is worth
ignoring a few jerks sometimes in order to keep the system open so some
other really great person can come strolling into my life.
You cant have the safe and secure utopia community *and* have an open
system. You can have a pretty darn good community though. This is
especially so if people are committed to it. This is what grex has
right now and hopefully will continue to have.
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tod
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response 68 of 155:
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Feb 12 21:40 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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slynne
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response 69 of 155:
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Feb 12 21:59 UTC 2004 |
I dont like the idea of other people's words having been deleted
without their permission. However, I dont see it happening again in the
near future and frankly, I dont think anyone's words that were deleted
are anything I will miss.
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tod
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response 70 of 155:
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Feb 12 22:11 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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iggy
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response 71 of 155:
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Feb 12 22:37 UTC 2004 |
the notion of "kicking out the trouble makers" is pretty risky because
just whose definition do you use? Who would speak for all of grex and
be the one to point fingers? Before you know it, someone will
be pointing at YOU.
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naftee
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response 72 of 155:
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Feb 12 23:08 UTC 2004 |
Hey, the GreX public did a pretty god job of kicking out two troublemakers:
jep and valerie.
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tod
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response 73 of 155:
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Feb 13 00:33 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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naftee
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response 74 of 155:
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Feb 13 01:08 UTC 2004 |
Gawd; better call in some more m-netters to fill in the empty seats!
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jmsaul
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response 75 of 155:
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Feb 13 01:17 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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jp2
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response 76 of 155:
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Feb 13 02:09 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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rational
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response 77 of 155:
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Feb 13 02:12 UTC 2004 |
:)
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jmsaul
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response 78 of 155:
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Feb 13 02:28 UTC 2004 |
(Fixed dumb typo)
In all of the verbiage and nastiness on both sides, Lynne's said one of the
most valuable things I've ever read about BBSing:
I have learned how to deal with unhealthy
types of social interaction. It's a skill. And one I happen to like
because it allows me to take more social risks than I might otherwise.
You have four choices:
1. Leave
2. Close the BBS to "undesirables"
3. React to undesirable behavior with stress and hostility
4. Learn to deal with unhealthy types of social interaction in a healthy
manner
When I've said in the past that it's best to ignore system twits, I'm not
saying that you should learn to like them. They're going to be a part of
Grex unless you shut the doors. It's unavoidable -- you may manage to
teach or bully or scold some into changing their behavior, but there will
always be more. It's up to you whether you continue to allow their
presence to stress you out, or learn to handle them in a healthier way.
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slynne
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response 79 of 155:
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Feb 13 03:56 UTC 2004 |
Wow. Thanks Joe. I agree with everything you have said in resp:78
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happyboy
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response 80 of 155:
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Feb 13 07:33 UTC 2004 |
this discussion has gone on longer than is comfortable for me.
i hope i don't get a tummyache because of it.
:(
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cmcgee
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response 81 of 155:
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Feb 13 12:50 UTC 2004 |
Go Joe! Go Lynne! Thanks for articulating why I'm staying. I too wish I
could "kick out" the people I perceive as "ruining" Grex. But I value Grex
more than I dislike them. And I want other people to realize that there are
quite a few of us who want to be in a community where healthy interactions
are the -norm-.
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iggy
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response 82 of 155:
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Feb 13 14:29 UTC 2004 |
huh.. i didn't get the same thing out of slynne and jmsaul that
cmcgee appeared to. i thought they were saying it is much healthier
to learn to deal with people rather than to kick everyone out so you can
have a private sanctuary.
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jp2
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response 83 of 155:
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Feb 13 14:41 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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remmers
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response 84 of 155:
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Feb 13 16:51 UTC 2004 |
I didn't read cmcgee's "I too" as referring to slynne and jmsaul.
And *I too* applaud what they said. :)
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tod
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response 85 of 155:
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Feb 13 17:51 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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keesan
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response 86 of 155:
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Feb 13 18:04 UTC 2004 |
I have not kicked people out. I use tools to avoid having to deal with the
messes they make, such as the ignore command, or fixseen when someone posts
all over agora or scribbles all over agora. If everyone did this the vandals
might get bored and go away.
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jp2
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response 87 of 155:
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Feb 13 18:09 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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albaugh
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response 88 of 155:
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Feb 13 18:28 UTC 2004 |
All that is fine, but it isn't about changing *grex* in any way - it's about
people essentially developing thicker skins or the ilk. And that isn't
something "grex" can do, other than perhaps posting a "warning" during
newuser or other places. So, while people leaving grex because they were
stressed out over the item killing kaper may be unfortunate, unless grex is
to become a private members-only club where no mean / nasty people would ever
show up, those as bailed, well "sorry to see you go, but..."
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tod
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response 89 of 155:
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Feb 13 19:25 UTC 2004 |
This response has been erased.
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anderyn
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response 90 of 155:
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Feb 13 19:39 UTC 2004 |
I think that a warning about this being the internet, etc. might be
appropriate. Seriously.
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