Can people change?

Mar 10 23:06 UTC 1997

Rick and Amy posed the question of the month: Can people change?  I
helpfully suggested that, well, if you implanted chicken brain cells into
their brains maybe people would start running around and flapping their
arms and clucking like chickens.  The more serious-minded of us were
positing that we have deep seated character or value systems that make us
who we are, for better or worse, all our lives.  We were a little confused
as to what we meant by values...but one of the Amys described a
value-identification workshop that she'd participated in, and she
reflected that certain things she had identified as important to
her--achievement, control, I think--explained a lot about her behavior in
school, work, marriage, etc.  We observed that people often seem to keep
getting involved in the same sort of relationships, even if it is
unsatisfactory.  We talked about rehabilitation of criminals, and working
with juvenile delinquents--can they really be helped?  I struggled to
apply economic analysis to the problem, and finally concluded 1) People
are stupid, and 2) People have irregular and discontinuous utility
functions.  Strangely enough, this insight was not considered by the group
to explain everything, so our meeting was adjourned with the whole matter
still unresolved. 

response 2 of 6:

Mar 11 16:30 UTC 1997

Hmmm, yes...raising children is certainly a test case.  I know quite a few
women around my age who were keenly aware of negative socialization of
women, and they swore they would raise their little girls
differently...and now as parents they are shrugging and saying, "the girls
just behave differently than the boys, no matter what I do."  So, speaking
of change, can we as a society change women into men?  Or, more
accurately, change both men and women into equivalent, non-gender-biased,
equally-represented members of the community?  Catriona, it sounds like
you have one destined to become a Republican, one destined to become a
Democrat...and what about the third? 

response 4 of 6:

Mar 12 05:47 UTC 1997

I'll second your friends' observations, nsiddall.  I raised two sons pretty
much on my own with a definite intent to raise them as though sex/gender
matters only after puberty and only in the mating process.  They are rather
more sensitive than my brothers, and more verbal ... but they still grew
up to be pretty traditional men.  (Well, insofar as one can tell at 15 and
16, anyway.)  I've come to think that part of that is because I could treat
them in more or less "genderless" ways but I couldn't protect them from the
social expectations they met outside my home, and part of it is becaise some
behavior seems to be hardwired.

response 6 of 6:

Mar 18 06:34 UTC 1997

Hmmm...well, I like to believe that my own character and personality and
behavior is not very well modelled by a mouse, Valerie.  Actually, I was
thinking of change as *intellectual* change, I think, because I tend to see
the human experience as largely an intellectual experience.  That certainly
seems very possible.  For example, there are lots of people who really thought
communism was a good idea, who observed it and thought about it for a long
time, and who finally, and substantially, changed their minds.  But I don't
feel I've really experinced very much of that myself.  I still feel pretty
much the same way about issues as I always have; I still try to solve problems
pretty much the same way I always have...I haven't learned anything that
really makes me a very different person, since high school, I guess...