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| Author |
Message |
carson
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The marriage
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Aug 15 04:15 UTC 1994 |
(your best friend is getting married. s/he wants you to be the best man/
bridesmaid. you think the marriage is a terrible idea.)
(do you accept?)
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| 15 responses total. |
brenda
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response 1 of 15:
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Aug 15 05:34 UTC 1994 |
Yes. Whether I agree with his/her choice of a spouse has no bearing.
I was asked to be an attendant becuase of my friendship with one
person, not because of my opinion about his/her intended.
.[D
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vegas
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response 2 of 15:
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Aug 15 07:57 UTC 1994 |
Yes. It's not the same as being the driver for a bank robbery, you know!
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aruba
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response 3 of 15:
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Aug 21 15:33 UTC 1994 |
Yes, I would do it and agree with #1 & #2.
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arwen
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response 4 of 15:
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Aug 22 22:51 UTC 1994 |
I would decline only if I was willing to lose the friendship.
And I think that the friendship would be significantly damaged
if not completely ruined. I don't know if I could stand up for
a friend if I *knew* they were doing the wrong thing. But....
how do I know it is the wrong thing?
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roz
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response 5 of 15:
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Aug 29 01:18 UTC 1994 |
I'd only decline if I objected to the marriage on grounds of
principle, like knowing my friend was already married or
something. I'm trying to think of any other "grounds of
principle" that would make me feel like a marriage was actually
wrong, and I can't thing of any. Can anyone else?
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carson
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response 6 of 15:
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Aug 29 06:21 UTC 1994 |
(would a marriage of convenience fit under the "wrong" category?)
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roz
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response 7 of 15:
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Aug 29 06:41 UTC 1994 |
Whose convenience? I guess if I just felt uneasy, I'd plead
one of those excuses like "But I always wash my hair on
Saturday nights".
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carson
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response 8 of 15:
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Aug 29 06:45 UTC 1994 |
<grin>
(actually, I was referring to marriage whose purpose is solely
something as shallow as power consolidation, whether that
power be political, financial, or some other sort.)
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gracel
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response 9 of 15:
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Aug 31 03:29 UTC 1994 |
Actually, it depends on how big the wedding was going to be.
If it was going to be a big to-do with "all the trimmings",
I would plead my natural distaste for spotlights and get out of
it. If it was just-beyond-an-elopement, I would be honest about
my opinions & say "If you still want me to stand up with you, I'm
game". If I'm right that the marriage is a mistake, my friend
is going to need her friends and I'd rather not alienate her
unnecessarily. Also, maybe I'm wrong ... it happens.
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simcha
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response 10 of 15:
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Dec 23 16:08 UTC 1994 |
Yes. If we're such close friends, she'd already know my feelings and
would have asked me in spite of that. I'm not marrying the
brute anyway.
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fraizer
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response 11 of 15:
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Dec 23 17:24 UTC 1994 |
I recently had to do just that. My best friend got married to a girl
I thought was a bad choice. He asked me to be best man and I said
yes. They now have a kid and are very much in love.
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mgout
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response 12 of 15:
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Feb 18 20:20 UTC 1995 |
yes
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abchan
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response 13 of 15:
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May 17 03:29 UTC 1995 |
Yes. If it's what he/she wants, my opinion of his/her fiance(e) is
irrelevant. I'd do it if it's what will make my best friend happy.
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ewhisam
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response 14 of 15:
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Dec 28 00:45 UTC 1995 |
Yep
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diznave
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response 15 of 15:
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Nov 9 08:06 UTC 1997 |
Accept, but throw up on the ring, at the crucial moment.
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