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toking
"poor boy" toking Mark Unseen   Mar 8 17:40 UTC 1999

"poor boy"

poor boy
it's just so hard for you
so insufferable
and all you can do 
is pull your mask over your eyes
is pull your lies over your life
you've been force fed
and mind fucked
you tried so hard to believe
tried to hard to live their life
poor boy
is it some mystery
some unfathomed enigma
don't they understand
why you're doing what you're doing
they must be blind my boy
you were to you know
until you finally let it go
now you've got to do this
now you've got to end this
so take your knife bobby
take whatever you can hold
I haven't seen you smile 
in such a long time
it's good to see it now Bobby
poor boy
I'm glad you've finally woken up
you're eyes are wide child
your eyes are wild son
you hold tight to that knife Bobby
`cause they're gonna try and take it
you know what you've gotta do then
when they try to take even that away from you
Yeah Bobby, that's exactly what you've gotta do
we're running out of time boy
I'm about to close my eyes again
they'll have to remember you now, Bobby
how could they ever forget?
poor boy
it's good to see you smile
9 responses total.
lumen
response 1 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 8 23:09 UTC 1999

This reminds me of Paul Simon's work during the late 70's, in a sort of 
twisted way.

The only thing I noted was that I know Bobby is the 'poor boy,' but the 
name appears so infrequently that it seems awkward.  Keeping him 
nameless would smooth out the poem a little.
zoe
response 2 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 8 23:38 UTC 1999

BOBBY!!! are you writing nonsense about my child!!! he's really a good 
boy, really.. the sweetest little boy you'd ever meet.. joe's just sore 
because i made him babysit him last sunday.. granted joe was bloody 
when i got home.. but bobby's just a little boy.. a good little boy, he 
could never hurt anyone.. could he joe?
toking
response 3 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 9 13:14 UTC 1999

I think...no...more than think...you're going a litte flippy here dear
:)
lumen
response 4 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 10 22:48 UTC 1999

Probably all the better reason to keep him nameless.  I still think 
naming a name leaves a noticeable seam in the poem.
bookworm
response 5 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 11 07:13 UTC 1999

depends on the poem.
zoe
response 6 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 12 00:18 UTC 1999

for the record: i was kidding.. i'm far to young to have a kid.. just 
incase anyone missed the sarcasm..
lumen
response 7 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 12 06:40 UTC 1999

I did, sorry-- you can't imply voice inflection or emotes over a 
computer network unless you use smilies :P
bookworm
response 8 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 12 06:59 UTC 1999

true.  
brighn
response 9 of 9: Mark Unseen   Mar 13 21:29 UTC 1999

#6 is confirming that guess of 13 for age, since 16 and up no longer qualifies
as "far too young to have a kid" =}
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