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Grex > Glb > #23: So, is this a _date_ or what? | |
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orinoco
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So, is this a _date_ or what?
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Feb 9 03:59 UTC 1998 |
How do you distinguish between a friendly trip someplace and a Date? - that's
a question that applies to anyone, really, but it's especially hard to figure
out among us gay folks. (I actually found myself tempted to use the phrase
'queer community'. Somebody hit me) <g>
I mean, if you get an invitation to do something from a MOTSS who you don't
know all that well, but know to be queer, is your initial assumption that this
person is trying to get to know you better as a friend, or that he/she/it is
Asking Your Out On A Date?
Alternately, if you were trying to ask a MOTSS on a Date, how would you make
it clear taht it really was a date ond not just a friendly excursion?
(You know, I'm beginning to understand why I've never much understood the
point of dating...)
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| 16 responses total. |
remmers
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response 1 of 16:
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Feb 9 13:51 UTC 1998 |
(This is probably a naive question, but I'm not really up on my
acronyms in this area. What does MOTSS stand for -- Munchkin of
the Same Sex?)
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keesan
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response 2 of 16:
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Feb 9 19:21 UTC 1998 |
Member of The Same Sex, I presume. I have always avoided formal situations,
which is what a date is. Some people seem to prefer having rules to follow
in their social interactions. Is it possible to actually ask 'Would you be
interested in going on a date?' Then you could both play the expected roles,
whatever they are nowadays. Or if you are asked to go somewhere 'Is this a
date?' What are the rules nowadays in hetero dating? Are there rules?
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orinoco
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response 3 of 16:
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Feb 9 23:36 UTC 1998 |
(See, I haven't payed much attention to hetero dating either. Oh well -
what's an old tree to do)
(I don't know, remmers, I'm sure there are some pretty cute munchkins out
there if you look hard enough)
(Dang, I'm starting to sound like carson. I gotta cut down on these parens)
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brighn
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response 4 of 16:
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Feb 10 00:05 UTC 1998 |
John's Guide to Acronyms
MOTSS - Member of the Same Sex
MOTOS - Member of the Opposite Sex
MOTAS - Member of the Appropriate Sex
ATM - Anything That Moves *giggles*
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font
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response 5 of 16:
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Feb 10 12:08 UTC 1998 |
Re: #4
Gee, guess I'll gave to get mace the next time I use an ATM card. <grin>
Back on topic:
Uhhhhh date? Huh? Generally, most interactions that I go on qualify as
HO...or Hanging Out. NO rules, no frills, just plain ol' hanging out.
Funny, "real" dates for me tend to happen after the meeting and getting to
know process has already gotten into the latter stages, and after deciding
that kinky stuff IOK. (is O.K. (what ever ok stands for...as I recal it 's
an acronym that was created in WWII to confuse enemies over the radio.))
They usually happen on SO (special occasions) when you just want to dress
to the nines and go to a nice place etc etc...and be conventionally silly.
(kind of a play acting thing...DMM (don't mind me))
Dating before really knowing *Anyone* really seems like a recipie for desaster
IMOH (in my humble opinion).
(font wonders if carson programs in lisp. it makes perenthesis
irresistable...)<drift=OFF>
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snowth
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response 6 of 16:
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Feb 11 05:18 UTC 1998 |
You know what I say. (Talk to Liza.. talk to liza...)
Fine, I'll shut up now. (Yes, I know I'm impossible. I love you anyway.)
(not all munchkins are cute... look at my sister)
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brighn
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response 7 of 16:
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Feb 11 18:53 UTC 1998 |
<set topic = off>
Etymology of O.K.
The etymology of this term, perhaps the most ubiquitous of all English terms
(competing in worldwide univerality only with "fuck" and "hi"), is in high
dispute. The standardly accepted etymology, which is almost certainly WRONG,
is that it was coined in the early to mid-19th Century as an abbreviation for
"Old Kinderhooks," nickname for one of the presidential hopefuls of the time
(who belonged to the O.K. Club, the Old Kinderhooks Club). A competing but
also likely incorrect etymology is that it's an abbreviation of "Oll Korrect,"
being a way of poking fun at the Germanic (primarily Dutch) immigrants who
pervaded the pbulishing industry. The most likely (but most distressing to
the white conservatives who still dominate English departments) is that it
comes from an African (Yoruban, I beleive, but I don't have my reference books
here) word, "oke" meaning "good." "Okeket" and "hepket" both mean "good man"
in this language, while "jez" is a sexual term (I beleive)... hence the early
Twentieth century spread of "hepcat" and "jazz" from the African-American
community. The most logical explanation is that (a) the term does, in fact,
come from "oke" and (b) the stigma of a *gasp* Negro word being widespread
in english in the mid-19th Century led to the formation of several moronic
etymologies and a modified spelling to account for them.
<set topic = on>
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void
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response 8 of 16:
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Feb 12 08:01 UTC 1998 |
you forgot the other theory about "oll korrect" being the way
semi-literate mississippi riverboat captains checked their bills of
lading.
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font
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response 9 of 16:
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Feb 12 09:23 UTC 1998 |
Oops, serves me right for listening in history class. Gee what a great
education system we have here in america...
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faile
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response 10 of 16:
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Mar 18 23:26 UTC 1998 |
I've had an interesting experience with the whole term date.... as a college
student, every summer, I goe home for three months each summer, work my tail
off, then pack up and come back here, 500 miles south of there for the next
nine months, exceptign a few, brief breaks. I have like 3 friends at "home",
and much to my chagrin on of these individuals introduced me to a guy. The
reason this is much to my chagrin is because she wated until early august to
do so-=- I was leaving in three weeks. So despite teh fact that we went on
a number of what might be defined by the general public as dates, I kept
insisting that they weren't dates-- because I figured taht a "date" had the
express intent of becoming romantically involved with the other indiviual
involved in the date, and I had *no* intention of becoming involved. (My more
amusing reasons not to call things dates strike me as so "high school" I want
to hit myself... "Well, I paid for myself, it wasn't a date..." or "If I meet
him at the movies, rather than let him pick me up, it isn't a date..." ) I
lost my batttle with myself, and despite the distance, I'm pretty firmly
attached....
<set babble=off>
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keesan
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response 11 of 16:
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Mar 19 20:41 UTC 1998 |
Can you still be going on dates with a permanent partner, or do you have to
use a new term?
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brown
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response 12 of 16:
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Mar 21 01:49 UTC 1998 |
actually sounds fairly good to me.. definition-wize...
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font
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response 13 of 16:
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Mar 29 08:30 UTC 1998 |
<shrug> I dunno. I don't know about "dates". It seems that there are fairly
specific things that are meant when one uses that word. Most of my encounters
with the perfered females don't "qualify"...but I don't know. It used to be
if you were spending any time with anyone it was called a date...some how I
like the old version better. I mean...a time where things aren't defined is
the most comfortable time to get to know someone and decide if that's the
person you want to be romanticly involved with...because you have time to
decide if that's what you want. IMHO
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keesan
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response 14 of 16:
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Mar 29 15:27 UTC 1998 |
A date - a period of probation?
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lumen
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response 15 of 16:
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Apr 12 03:04 UTC 1998 |
I like 'testing the waters,' myself.
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font
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response 16 of 16:
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Apr 13 06:47 UTC 1998 |
It's a phrase I am not apt to remember in such occasions.
But it is a nice one....
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