response 90 of 157:

Feb 7 03:32 UTC 2004

I think that this comes down to several different interpretations of what Grex
is to its users and the assumptions that they were using the system under.
I certainly -- before this discussion -- never realized that people actually
read old items, and I never thought of discussions being archived for the
ages. To me, agora/various cfs in various incarnations were current
discussions, which were fun and informative while on-going, but I'd never go
back and re-read it once the current discussion was done. I thought of it as
a conversation more than publishing -- fleeting and impermanent. Obviously,
this informs how I see the current vote -- I don't feel as if it's such a big
deal because (at least in jep's case, and in valerie's old diaries) the items
were closed long ago (a few years, right?) and the discussion was over. I
think that this is not the way everyone sees it, but some of us do (I'm
agreeing with keesan, at least. Amazing!).  Also, since to me it's a
conversation more than "writing", I don't feel this attachment to my words.
I wrote them, yes,  but they aren't something I have my ego attached to, in
the same way that I do things that I write for publication or that I write
with the intent of having people read them (as in essays, etc.) I write my
postings in the best way I can, and I try to make them clear and legible, but
they aren't agonized over and polished and "written" in the same way that I
write for publication. 

I do realize that other people have other viewpoints, but you must realize
that my viewpoint is as valid as yours -- my Grex is also a valid Grex. I
think that people are getting into "one true wayism" here, and it's got to
stop if we're going to build a Grex that everyone will still be comfortable
with. 

I know that I will never post anything beyond the most trivial and most fluffy
details of my life on this system again. I won't share who I am, or what I
would like to have help with, or details of my past that might shine light
on another's problems, since I don't like being made fun of, as I was in the
"agora" parody cf. on M-net. I don't like it. I don't appreciate it. I don't
think it was funny and I really resent the fallout from it (Valerie's reaction
and Jep's sudden desire to have his divorce items removed among other things).
I resent the fact that some people are apparently so lacking in empathy that
they can say "it's only pixels. it's only the internet" when people do very
clearly do find these pixels to be communication and ways to reach out to
other people. I resent some people insisting that obviously everything needs
to stay online forever because otherwise there will be no free speech. I feel
as if I can't share anything terribly personal anymore, because there's no
community here. And that's very sad.